Before we start:

What makes someone "good" at singing?

You might think to be good at singing you would follow all of the classic singing tips like these:

• Sing from your diaphragm
• Have proper posture
• Relax your lips, jaw and tongue
• Singing voice should reflect talking voice
• Singing should be healthy and gentle on vocal cords

But there are plenty of examples of very popular singers who don't do this.

• Billy Corgan (Smashing Pumpkins)
• Not from diaphragm (eg, Tonight Tonight, or Bullet with Butterfly Wings)
• Likely didn't even think about his posture or relaxing anything
• Bob Dylan
• He broke all of the singing tips
• He sang with a completely different voice on Nashville Skyline (singing voice doesn't have to reflect talking voice)
• John Mayer
• Didn't relax his mouth (just watch some old videos and see how tense his mouth/entire face is)
• Patrick Stump (Fall Out Boy)
• For their first album he didn't sing from diaphragm, and was really nasally
• Adam Duritz (Counting Crows)
• Not relaxed (sometimes sounds like he's in pain while singing)
• Sometimes stutters while he sings (at least live)
• Stevie Wonder
• Gets really nasally (not relaxing his nose), doesn't always sound like singing from diaphragm
• Elliott Smith
• Nasally and sounds like he's holding back (not using diaphragm)
• Elton John
• Had to have surgery due to stress on vocal cords
• Tom Waits
• There's no need for any explanation here

The list can go on and on and on.

These are all really convincing singers in their own ways, but they all blatantly violate classic singing advice (and therefore accepted singing technique).

All of these examples and evidence is enough for me to say:

These widely accepted singing tips are not just wrong. They are damaging to anyone who wants to be good at singing.

The thing that all the vocalist above have in common isn't their vocal technique. It is that they put on a convincing and meaningful act.

And by "good act" I mean that in the sense of the vocalist being an actor.

So to be a good singer: learn how to act.

Throw out vocal technique, and use acting tips and techniques:

• Read, listen, and watch others sing
• Know your character
• Know your lines

And if there were just one rule it would be: be convincing.

It doesn't even matter how you make yourself convincing. You could whisper, you could sing, you could scream, you could breath into a microphone.

Just don't waste your time thinking you aren't relaxed enough, you're not using your diaphragm, or it's your posture.